Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Oh Canada!

So…. Canada, what’s up?

Yesterday my wife brought home a small gift that one of the salesmen in her office picked up during a visit to Canada. It got me to thinking. What does Canada do?

I’ve got several friends that have gone on vacations there.

“Beautiful!”

“Awesome!”

“Did you know boiling water can freeze instantly here?”

I’m not sure that last one belongs in the “pro” column, so I’ll just say two outta three ain’t bad.

I already knew that Canada exports some great acting and comedic talent.  I also read something about white cowboy hats, the royals and potted plants recently.

So I decided to do a bit of research and share it with the world. Here is my short list of What Canada Does When We’re Not Looking:

1. Exports a CRAPLOAD of timber.
2. Oil too.
3. And grain.
4. They make cars.
5. On average live 80.7 years (as of 2007)
6. My Grandfather was born in Saskatchewan. 
7. They eat a log of eggs
8. Invent basketball.
9. World's largest source of Cesium!
10. They call their money the loonie. At time of this writing worth $1.0397 U.S.
11. Live withing 100 miles of the U.S. border. (ready to invade)


I like to stop at 11. It’s a nice number. You can’t give a cute nickname like “dozen” and you can’t indicate it silently by holding up 11 fingers. Well, except for the guy who killed Inigo Montoya’s father, most people can’t.

And teeny tiny bottles of Maple Syrup.
 

4 comments:

  1. Teeny-tiny bottles of syrup that retail for eighteen dollars.

    Eighteen. Dollars.

    You got it out of a tree. For free. It leaked out of a hole, you boiled it, and now you want me to sell my firstborn child to buy it.

    Dumb Canadian Jerks.

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  2. I wondered how the Canadian GDP was so high.

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  3. Not just Loonies...there are $2 coins, Twonies.

    They make great beer (but, alas, make it difficult to buy when you're "in country.")

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  4. Yes, Canadians do make some great beer. If I spent 8 months a year digging my car out of snow drifts, scraping the windshield, clearing the walk, freezing my balls off, I'd want some really good beer to shake the chill off.

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